2.11.2009

SOS PLEEZ SUM1 HELP ME

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DAAAMN, GINA! HE GOT SOME FINE MUSCLES.

TOTALLY GIVIN' ME SLEEPING WITH THE ENEMY THOUGH, RIGHT?? IT'S LIKE, MARTIN "THE ENEMY" BURNEY COMIN' BACK TO HIS FANCY BEACH HOUSE AND FREAKIN' COZ LAURA DIDN'T HAVE THE TOWELS STRAIGHT = CHRIS "BOSSY TOP" BROWN COMIN' BACK TO HIS FANCY SILVER LAMBORGHINI AND FREAKIN' COZ RIH DIDN'T HAVE THE LEVELS ON HIS STEREO STRAIGHT.

RIGHT?

(PS: REMEMBER MARTIN BELLOWING "LAURA? LAAAURA? LAAAURAAAAA??" INTO THE SEA AFTER SHE DISAPPEARS? MY AUNT TONI SAYS IT STILL GIVES HER CHILLS.)

BUT U KNOW THE SAD PART ABOUT THIS? IT'S PRETTY MUCH LIKE RIHANNA HELD A PRESS CONFERENCE AND WAS, LIKE, "OH FYI: MY MAN GOT A LITTLE DICK THAT DON'T DO SHIT." COZ EVERY BITCH WORTH A DAMN KNOWS IF THE DICK IS GOOD, U DON'T CALL THE COPS! U THROW SOME CONCEALER ON THAT SHIT, PUT SOME DAMN GLOVES ON YOUR BIT-UP FINGERS (BTW BOO-HOO), AND OPEN WIDE. IF I HAD TO CALL THE COPS, I'D BE, LIKE, "FIRST, THIS MAN CAN'T FUCK. SECOND, HE HIT ME. THIRD, THIS MAN CAN'T FUCK. HOW MANY OF THOSE CAN I PRESS CHARGES FOR?"

BUT U KNOW I'D STILL TAKE IT.

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